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Thread: Adoption vs. Abortion

  1. #61

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    Can someone explain this whole line of responses to me? Is this...
    Why would you punish a woman for doing what you "encourage" her to do.
    the exact question we're talking about?

  2. #62

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    Adoption is virtually always the better choice. Using adoption; the baby gets a chance at life, AND the parents have the chance to see the child they created again (or even re-gain custody if the time comes).

  3. #63

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    Quote Originally Posted by organiccornflake View Post
    Adoption is virtually always the better choice. Using adoption; the baby gets a chance at life, AND the parents have the chance to see the child they created again (or even re-gain custody if the time comes).
    . I once felt this way too until I worked for an adoption agency just out of college. There's one person from your equation that's conspicuously absent - the mother! From working for the agency, I can tell you that adoption is only the better choice for the prospective parents. The psychological damage to the mother is extreme and long lasting, very similar to those people who have a child kidnapped and they aren't found swiftly. There are also effects to the child as many scooters later develop trust, intimacy, and other attachment and emotional issues, even those adoptees who wind up with a "good" adoptive family. And so-called "open" adoption is not legally binding or enforceable in the majority of states. Once a mother relinquishes, the prospective parents are the parents and as such they can determine who has access to the child regardless of any agreements they may have made. A dirty little secret of the adoption industry is that the majority of "open" adoptions are closed within a year by the adopting couple. The mother is often young or poor or both and so when they don't fulfill the agreement, she often has no way to afford enforcement of the agreement and the courts overwhelmingly favor the adopting couple. I had to leave the agency because I just couldn't take getting phone calls from young women who quickly figured out that they had been horribly exploited.

    I once believed that adoption was the answer but what I've come to realize is that adoption does nothing for a woman who doesn't want to remain pregnant. And after 2 pregnancies from hades, I don't think I can support that women be forced to remain pregnant when they don't want to be. Adoption is only an option after a woman has decided to stay pregnant but that decision must be the first one. And afterward, I would encourage almost every woman to consider parenting above and beyond any other decision.

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